Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Our donor...who is she?

It's a mystery! (We chose an anonymous donor). I think about her sometimes and wonder if I've ever seen her (in a store, at the gym, etc.) It will always be an unknown for us, which we are perfectly fine not knowing. Obviously, we have some information about her--the information that helped us select her as our donor--such as her age, weight, height, eye color, hair color, occupation, and medical history. We also received three photos of her, which pictured her as a baby, toddler and young child. Does she look anything like me? Not really. Does that really matter? I don't think so. Heck, growing up, I never felt I looked like my parents (besides eye color). I occasionally wondered if I was adopted, and I know that wasn't the case. I wasn't my Mom's mini-me in the physical sense, but I can say (husband can second this) I sure do have my Mom's mannerisms now. So, I'm not really too crushed if our ED child looks nothing like me.

So who is our donor? She's a young woman who decided she was going to help a couple have a child. Why? I do wonder what her motives are, but then I think does it really matter? Did she need the money? (So what, most people need the money nowadays.) Did she witness a friend or family member suffer from infertility? Or maybe she wants to do something good for someone else? Regardless, her reasons for donating her eggs--she has a kind heart (even if it's for the money). Donating your eggs is no walk in the park. The screenings and procedure itself can be very uncomfortable and not to mention very time-consuming (multiple trips to the clinic). Not just anyone would donate their eggs. Some women might not be concerned with the actual procedure and time commitment, but the way they feel after donating their eggs. I've never been an egg donor or considered donating my eggs (when I had some), so I can only imagine the questions/thoughts of an egg donor.

It's only human nature to think about the unknown. I have a feeling though...once our baby is in my arms--how he/she got here will not matter, but knowing the baby is ours to love is all that matters.

1 comment:

  1. I understand what you mean. It's nice to read another's perspective on this. Very grateful to our donor. Definitely in the end the baby(ies) will be yours and it won't matter how they came to you. Good luck :)